Processing pain

I had an experience not too long ago that caused me to have a lot of emotional pain.  After learning all that I have I was able to handle it and not avoid it.  Everyone will have pain we are all human and that is part of the human experience.  Avoiding it will only cause it to fester.  Avoiding will also cause a net negative when you eat and your are not hungry, drink, feel sick, buy stuff, too much Instagram or Facebook. Some people resist or react which looks like blaming, hating, yelling, lying, etc.

Processing it is the key to getting through it.  Processing is choosing to feel it.  We don’t want to feel it because it’s “bad” it is not bad it just is a vibration in our body that doesn’t feel good.  When we are willing to allow it it will go away faster.  Sometimes we don’t take the time to find the thought that is causing it so that’s when we just feel.  Find where it is your body, ask some questions what color is it?  Is it hot or cold?  It it heavy or light?  Don’t try to fix it.  You can also write down everything that you are thinking.  Allow the painful vibration to be there.  It may take time for it to go away and it may come and go for hours, days, weeks?

Last week my son’s sixth grade teacher was saying some very harsh things to these 11 and 12 year olds.  She said, “I want to punch you in the neck.”  She also told another kid she wanted to slap him.  The more moms and kids I talked to and text the more harsh things I heard.  I couldn’t believe this.  She was their teacher and was supposed to be helping these kids and trying to uplift, teach and help them.  I kept hearing about one girl that she was particularly mean to from several different people.  In my mind she was bullying.  She didn’t say any of this to my son, but it still was not ok with me.  As I write this I can see some of my thoughts, but at the time I couldn’t.  I don’t even know exactly what I was feeling, but I did try and process it.  My heart was beating fast and I was short of breath.  I sat down and took deep breaths and verbalized what I was feeling and that it was coming from my thoughts.  I didn’t try and make it go away.  I didn’t eat to avoid it I just felt it.  I went to bed feeling better but then the next day I felt it again.  I took deep breaths and just let it be.  By that evening it was gone.  Days after as I talked about it I didn’t feel it anymore.  I still had the same situation, but the emotion was gone.  Some action has been taken with this teacher and I do feel better about that.

We all will experience pain but when we will allow it it won’t be near as bad.  Have you practiced this before?  What do you do to help handle the “negative” emotion?

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