“I’m the nicest person I know” or am I?

“I’m the nicest person I know.” That’s a thought I’ve thought for a LONG time. I don’t even know when it originated. It sounds nice and lovely, but maybe that’s not the case.

Today I was getting coached on something else and this came up. What I’ve been pondering is that what if I’m not the nicest person I know? What does that mean about me? It means nothing. That’s easy to say, but harder to believe. I think I thought it because it sounds like a great thing to aspire to and then I’d act and be nice even though maybe I’m not feeling nice.

But, when I think that thought actually my brain answers it with, “no you’re not __________ is the nicest person.” So I am actually using it as a way to judge myself and not be very nice to me. When I am with someone and I’m judging them I am judging me and proving to myself that I am actually not the nicest person I know. This isn’t to say that I don’t want to try and be nice.

If a robber came in my house and tried to hurt us or steal would I want to be “the nicest person I know.” NO! I wouldn’t.

USE QUALIFIERS
One thing that for me has helped me keep this, but change it a little is, “sometimes I’m the nicest person I know, and sometimes I’m not, AND THAT’S OK.”

So adding “and that’s ok” to the end of a sentence helps or use sometimes at the beginning or end, or I love me anyway.

Such a strange concept to think about. What lovely thoughts do you have that are actually not useful?

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